Euthanasia is such a strange word. Just by looking at the word itself, you'd have no idea what it means.
Today I had to sign a piece of paper that gave my consent to allow my veterinarian to perform Euthanasia on my rabbit. The vet's assistant asked me if I was sure with my choice, and did I want the vet to take a look at the rabbit before we took the next step.
She had been sick for almost a month. The original diagnosis was "pneumonia or cancer." Not a happy outlook for a rabbit over 7 years old. We treated for pneumonia and gave her antibiotics for 2 1/2 weeks. Didn't seem to do any good, but she wasn't getting any worse. She was eating, drinking and doing all the normal things bunnies do - she just had to gasp for breath while she was doing it.
Then she stopped eating this weekend. If I had to guess, she lost about 2 pounds in 3 days. We were watching her slowly starve to death, and her breathing was getting worse. I had hoped that she would pass on her own. No such luck.
Today we decided to put her to sleep. I have never had to make that decision before. But over the last few days, she kept staring at me with this big, beautiful brown eyes, telling me something. I don't know what it was. Perhaps it was - you are an idiot, get me more antibiotics. Or it was - just put me out of my misery.
It seems silly to be this upset about losing a pet. I have lost three now in about one year. They all lived to be ripe, old ages for their species - I had guinea pigs who were over 6 years old. Usually they don't live past 4, if they're lucky.
My boss is losing her mother at this moment. She has been sick for a very long time, and that family is suffering tremendously, right along side their dying mother. It doesn't seem right for me to be sad about my pet, when it could be so much worse.
So I returned from the vet and put bunny in her custom made box/coffin (thanks to Caleb). I tore down her cage, brought it to the garage and threw out her food. I vacuumed up all the hay and cleaned up the mess and put the furniture back in place. I will take a hot shower, make a hot toddy and go to bed early. Sad as I am, I am going to move on with life.
After all, it's just a rabbit, right?
